
I am having a BLAHHHHHH day! I am either fighting some sort of nasty sick off or my allergies are in full swing today... can't tell which one yet... I'm praying allergies...
My loving hubby woke me up as usual, gently... trying to get me out of bed.... I didn't budge... in fact... I'm pretty sure I kinda yelled at him about pushing his elbows in my back in the middle of the night.... I was ROTTEN this morning.... He went about getting the household going and would come back and check on me.... I grumped that I had a sore throat and I was achy all over... He stayed chipper and moved my totally NOT a morning person, daughter onto her morning routine.... I finally asked him if he would mind making her lunch and taking her to school.... Now in order for him to do this he would have to delay his departure to work... he makes his own hours somewhat so it isn't like his boss would be waiting wondering where he was... BUT he does like to get in early so he can get out early and be home with us... Anyways, my sweet, even in the face of a REALLY GRUMPY, totally NASTY, you so don't want to be around, wife.... my sweet hubby said "sure I can do that." Now did I get all gooey inside and snap out of my rotten mood and say thank you...NOPE! I pulled the covers over my head and tried to go back to sleep..... But instead of taking the gracious help offered I decided the world inside my house could just not go on without me driving it... So I would scream down at my husband and daughter at different points.... I couldn't let them REALLY help me... which is all they REALLY wanted to do. Instead of just letting the dark cloud be over me... I tried my darnedest to make them feel it too!
I love you Kev.... thank you for your help and understanding this morning... I am so sorry I made it tough for you..... I was wrong.... and I behaved in a pretty ungrateful way.
Manda..... thank you for doing your job this morning and getting yourself ready for school... thanks for helping Daddy and being considerate to me. Thank you for not whining at me even though I know you wanted to crawl back in bed too. I am sorry I was so grumpy... I love you so much and can't wait to see you sing tonight... I know you will be great!
Bad mood and all... I did learn something... a lesson I wish I could say I hadn't had the opportunity to learn before... but I have... MANY times... I hope it sticks today... I learned that no matter how dark it seems... it is just temporary... the dark skies will clear... you will feel better.... and if your lucky, like me, you will have the help of others to get you through it... but even if there is no one there... or seems like there is no one... GOD is there! God will get you through it and pull you out the other side showing you something about yourself you didn't know.... gently nudging you to make changes... do better the next time... be aware of the affect you have on the world around you and the people in your life. Just make sure you don't miss it, like I did this morning, God was with me... trying to help... he gave me everything I needed, he nudged my hubby and my daughter to be there for me and I wouldn't let them... In short... I turned God's helping hand down this morning.... Crazy I know... I mean I half accepted it... but I bet I'd be feeling a WHOLE lot better right now if I'd have just let go and let them really help me.
My prayer this morning:
God, man You are SO AWESOME! Even when I loose my focus on You, You are still there focused on me. Taking care of me.... holding me in Your loving hands. Endless Thank You's God... I am humbled at Your feet, I am sorry that I did not see You this morning, that I turned away from Your gracious help. I ask that You send me with reflection and growth. That You grant me the clarity I need to see You at work in my life. That I would be more receptive to Your help. In Jesus name, Amen.
Reflecting on this morning I realize... I'm out of sync.... This morning I put God on the back burner again.... I haven't been listening to Him, He has been right there and I have been too blind to see.... But you know what? I also realize... that even when I have Him on the back burner, which is of course no place for Him to be.... He's still got me on His front burner... and He is totally tuned in and turned on and ready to be there for me! And at the same time.... He's got YOU on another one of His front burners ready to be there for YOU, if only you let Him.
When in your life, has God extended his helping hand, and you have turned it down?
In the stove of your life... what burner do you have God on?
3 comments:
AAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW my baby I LOVE you to and not to worry I know what it's like not to feel good. But it was so sweet of you to get naked and tell the world.
I so hope you recover quickly from whatever has you in it's grip.
Remember to take it easy OK.
Your LOVING Hubby...
Hi Tami, Happy birthday from Viv And I.
hi tami, thank you for your comment and it was a true blessing sitting in that room with such wonderful women changed by Christ and on fire for him...see you around church hopefully :)
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